Dominic Riccitello
May 5, 2026

in my thoughts

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i wake in the silence the hollow underneath the noise our backs turned sideways like two people pretending distance could soften what we feel i can sense the turbulence between us the subtle shifts in breathing the tension hidden inside stillness we move through time carefully swaying from line to line moment to moment trying not to disturb the fragile shape of this and i bask in it anyway trying to understand what this could become what we are when no one else is around when the room is dim and honesty finally has somewhere to sit i know you feel it i know you can taste it the weight of it resting on your tongue that is what leaves me here surrounded by books and details memorizing the way you exist the way your arms wrap around me like you’re afraid something beautiful always leaves eventually these are things i know you feel too i reel and i follow circling thoughts like they might lead me back to you asking you to stay inside this moment with me a little longer before fear ruins it between the salt burns of our time the wounds we never named i move without stepping like memory itself is carrying me arms tight around the shape of what we were eyes locked in resistance both of us pretending we don’t know how much this matters i’m not sure how you do this how you hide hurt so carefully how you stand there composed while your sadness leaks through the smallest details we break just to bend again i slam books onto shelves trying to organize the chaos in my head but every thought returns to you to the quiet sadness living in these rooms to the weeks i held you like something sacred your fingers locked inside mine as if we could preserve time through touch alone and now i leave you here i stand at the end of your hallway watching the distance stretch between us and i look at you really look at you like i’m trying to memorize every last detail before it disappears do you feel this i know you do i ask questions even when i already know the answers because i need to hear them leave your mouth i need proof that this existed outside my own head the way your tongue moves around words the pulse in your neck our silence breathing louder than conversation the warmth of your skin against mine the touch of my veins resting atop your leg like my body itself was trying to stay connected to you to dance inside this the bliss of our echoes words moving softly from room to room the kind of intimacy that makes ordinary spaces feel holy we etch ourselves into what we believe carving meaning into fleeting things hoping they survive longer than we do i ask you to take a chance but sometimes chances feel too heavy sometimes love asks for more courage than people know how to carry and in time you begin to regret the silence the pauses the things left unsaid the moments fear stole from you before you even realized they mattered that is why i say everything everywhere all at once because the truth is we do not regret honesty we regret restraint the words we buried alive the nights we let slip into shadows the people we almost held onto the touch that feels too good convinces us it cannot stay that something this gentle must eventually disappear but it can stay if you let it